“Think about the people who have it worse than you.”


Depreciation of your own experience is as harmful as taking everything for granted. There are always people whose circumstances are worse than yours at first sight. But it’s not an excuse to poke your nose into other people’s business and to raise your own self-esteem at the expense of the problems of others.
Want to take your mind off? It’s worth helping someone who really needs it. But before that, make sure that you are not fooled by professional beggars.

“Let it go.”


If a classmate gives you this advice before an exam, maybe you can listen to it. But if there are some problems in your family, then letting go of the situation means going with the flow and accepting things that aren’t serving you without trying to make anything better. Of course, try not to overdo it: dragging your significant other to a compulsory weekly counseling with a family psychologist may not be the best way to fix an issue. But if you are dissatisfied with your family life, start with yourself — without the expectation that your changes will immediately be appreciated.

“You must deal with it.”


No one likes to be obligated to do something. When you hear “you must deal with it,” you may get a feeling that the person doesn’t care enough to talk to you about your problems and, if it’s needed, get back to them again. There are several possible reasons for this: either this person is not your real friend or doesn’t have the time to help you, or you spend more time complaining than finding a solution.

“Don’t blame yourself for past mistakes.”


This advice may work if you’re hearing it from a psychologist and he suggests a few possible ways of how to deal with past experiences and offers some forgiveness techniques for yourself and others. But if this advice belongs to your accountant or an auto mechanic, it’s probably useless.

“Just forget about them.”


If only everything were that easy! Even the adviser probably knows that if you don’t suffer enough, don’t let all this pain go away, you’ll have no starting point to get back to normal life. So the best reply to such advice would be, “You don’t have any real advice, do you?”

“Change your strategy.”


Again, you can’t completely believe a person who read a few psychology books and now tries to force his advice on everyone. If you managed to quit smoking thanks to a book, it may not work for other people, but they may become so impressed with a documentary about meat, that they’ll become vegetarians. Only people who have information about different methods can give advice on possible strategies in accomplishing your goals.

“Just get used to it.”


People who give such terrific advice probably have never heard of the proverb, “Even if you’ve been eaten, you still have 2 ways out.” It’s much easier to whine about an unfortunate fate than to build your happiness yourself. As we all know, it’s always the darkest before dawn, so if you’re really determined to reach your goals, you have to harness your willpower and find new ways to become a groundbreaker, not just a passer-by.

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